Second Chances
by All4Gabby
Summary: Gibbs is finally back from Mexico. Both he and Abby are doing some soul searching about their relationship.
1. Reflections

This is set post-"Hiatus"...it features Gibbs' thoughts about a certain special someone.

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**Chapter 1 - Reflections**

I told myself that I didn't care.

That I just didn't care.

And for a long time I truly believed that I didn't care.

Until I began seeing her everywhere.

There was that time when I was walking down the street; I know they were her pigtails that I saw in the distance.

Last week I was sure I saw her going into a Goth store wearing one of her outrageous t-shirts.

Then there was that time that I was standing outside the coffee shop, and could have sworn that I smelled her homemade perfume laced with gunpowder. I'd recognize that scent anywhere.

But of course it wasn't her.

The black pigtails belonged to a kid who couldn't have been more than 12 years old.

And as it turned out, the girl at the Goth store was really a man. Made me think of DiNozzo - he always liked she-males!

And the gunpowder? I was a Marine sniper for years – I smell it all the time.

Snap out of it; get a grip on yourself; you've moved on.

My brain was saying it, but my heart was refusing to accept it. My heart told me that I was a stupid fool who had turned my back on the only good thing that had entered my life in the past 15 years.

There were a million reasons to justify why I left.

I was far too old for her.

She deserved someone better than me.

We had nothing in common.

She was so full of life, while most of the time I felt like an empty shell. Except when I was with her.

And besides, that "music" of hers always drove me nuts.

Those may have been reasons to justify why I was leaving, but they were also all reasons why I wanted so badly to stay. But of course I did the only thing that I knew how to do – I left. Left without a goodbye; just a finger pressed gently to her lips and a soft kiss on her cheek. I had convinced myself that we were both better off this way.

And I have to hand it to her, even though I could tell that she was absolutely devastated and that she wanted more than anything to convince me to stay, she let me do what I needed to do. In the process I broke her heart.

I guess that's why there's two B's in my name. The second one's for bastard.

I've been back in town for almost a month, and I still haven't set foot near the Navy yard. My brain says that it's because I no longer work at NCIS, and I have no reason to go there.

But who am I kidding? I just don't want to risk running into her.

I don't know if she would even talk to me if I did.

I certainly don't deserve it.

I certainly don't deserve her.

I'm such a bastard.

I've come to realize that I can try to hide from it all I want, but I know deep down I do care.

I really do care.

I care more than anything.

I walk to the door, pick up my keys, and head to the car.

I'm going to the Navy yard.

To NCIS.

To Abby.


	2. Conflicted

Chapter two of my story...also post-"Hiatus"...these are Abby's thoughts about a special someone.

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**Chapter 2 - Conflicted**

Come on, focus.

I need to focus on my samples.

Right. Focus. Samples.

I could care less about the stupid samples.

This whole place is driving me crazy. In the past few months, it seems like there's been a never ending parade of people coming into my lab with that same sympathetic look on their face, asking me if I'm ok. Of course I'm ok! Why the heck wouldn't I be ok? Look…..see? I'm fine. FINE.

Even my lab equipment, my faithful lab equipment, seems to be turning on me. My computer has some hinky virus and most of the time refuses to function. My microscope's focus dial is sticky, and I can't focus in on my slides properly. And my baby, my mass spectrometer, which has NEVER let me down, has developed a mind of its own, and keeps stopping and starting for no apparent reason.

Why is my stuff doing this to me? It's never let me down like this before…..Never let me down. Not like Gibbs.

I still can't believe that he left. He left me.He never even said goodbye. All I got was a finger pressed to my lips and a peck on my cheek. Boy, that was satisfying! If he wasn't so stubborn, selfish, and self absorbed, then maybe he could have seen the impact that his leaving was going to have on all of us. His leaving was like ripping the heart out of NCIS. I should know how that feels, because in the process he ripped out my heart and stomped on it.

I wonder if he would have stayed if he knew how I felt about him. Why didn't I tell him? God knows I had enough chances over the years, But it just never seemed like the right time to do it.

Stop kidding yourself, Abs. He still would have left even if he had known. Gibbs would tell you that he was leaving because he couldn't stand all the political BS involved in his job. Honestly, I think that's a load of you-know-what. His pride was wounded, so he did the only thing he knows how to do when the going gets tough. He left.

Wow, that was harsh. But what gets me more is why it has to be the truth.

But you know what? I'm okay with it now. Really, I am. In the beginning, after he left, I went a little crazy. I broke into his house and stole one of the t-shirts that he had left behind. It smelled of sawdust.

I never thought that the smell of sawdust could be that sexy to me. But that was before I met Gibbs. My silver haired fox.

Taking the shirt, that was a bit stalker-ish. Well, thank god that stage passed in a hurry. The shirt is stashed in the back of my closet. I've basically forgotten all about it. I'm thinking of getting rid of it, actually……….later.

What's that beeping noise? Oh yeah, my samples. Guess the first test is finished. Time for the next one.

That's my other problem. I haven't been able to concentrate on my work properly in ages. I'll be absorbed in my work, and someone will say something, or something will happen that reminds me of Gibbs. I'm pretty much hopeless after that. It's not enough that he had to rip out my heart when he left, but now even his memory is coming back to torture me.

I really hate him for leaving. For leaving me. For being such a selfish bastard.

You know what, I'm glad he left. Good riddance. I'm better off without him anyway. It's way too quiet in here. I need some music. Everyone knows that I do my best work with my music blasting….There, that's better…..Hey, I LOVE this song!

Ok, where was I? This test I'm doing on the samples isn't going to be done for a bit, so maybe I'll try to find out what's wrong with my mass spec.

Aww…..come on baby…tell Mommy what's wrong with you so she can make it all better…..I think it might be your wiring. I'd better crawl underneath and get a better look…..wow it's dusty under here!

What's that smell? Smells like sawdust…..but where the heck is it coming from? Never mind, it must just be from those maintenance guys I saw around earlier.

OK, WHO THE HELL TURNED OFF MY MUSIC?As soon as I get out from under here and untangle myself from these wires, someone's going to die! That was my favourite song!

The smell of sawdust seems stronger now……wonder what they're doing…..Who cares! I need to get out of here, and give whoever's there a piece of my mind.

I feel a hand on my shoulder, and another hand on my other arm, pulling me back up onto my feet. Wow, talk about persistent! Geez, can't you give me two seconds? I can do it myself!

I turn around to give my mystery guest hell.

But I can't find the words.

For once in my life I'm speechless.

I can't move, I'm in shock.

My heart is racing.

I can't believe it.

Oh my God, he's here!

GIBBS!


	3. Revelations

This is the third and final chapter of "Second Chances"...once again post-"Hiatus".

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**Chapter 3 - Revelations**

For a while neither of them spoke. Abby was in shock because Gibbs was actually there after all this time. And for Gibbs, the surge of emotions that he felt when he looked into Abby's eyes made it impossible for him to even attempt to speak.

But as suddenly as it began, the moment was over, broken by the loud, incessant beeping of the timer attached to the centrifuge that held Abby's blood samples.

"Don't you think you should get that?" said Gibbs, the hint of a smile playing at the corners of his lips.

"I….um…..yeah….yeah, I probably should. If I leave the samples in the centrifuge for too long, it will totally mess up the results of the DNA tests that I need to do" Abby blurted out nervously. "You see, the whole process is time sensitive. If I don't remove the samples in the next minute or so, the samples will be ruined, which means that I'll have to start the whole process over again, and that will put me WAY behind, and then that will put the whole investigation behind,……"

"Abs?", Gibbs interrupted, "Shouldn't you get the samples?". He looked pointedly at the machine. Finally Abby snapped out of it, ran to the machine, shut it down, and rescued her sample tubes.

Abby still had her back to Gibbs; she was busy drawing blood out of each test tube for the first step of the DNA testing. "So, when did you get back from Mexico?".

"I've been back for about a month. I had to come in to sign some papers, so I decided to come and pay you a visit." Gibbs lied. "Sorry I didn't bring a Caff-Pow, but it looks like you've already taken care of that….."

Abby straightened up, and turned back to face Gibbs. He could see the anger and hurt in her eyes. "How can you just walk into my lab after all this time, and expect me to act like nothing ever happened? Well, I've got news for you. Things change. Things are different. You left, remember? Excuse me if it's going take a little time for me to adjust to you being back."

After a few seconds, Gibbs said, "Look, maybe this wasn't such a good idea after all.". He turns and begins to leave the lab. He was almost to the door when Abby spoke again.

"I can't believe that you're leaving AGAIN. Is that how you handle it when things get rough or you don't get your way? Yup, just get up and leave. That will solve EVERYTHING, won't it?", Abby was almost shouting by the end.

Gibbs stopped, turned back towards Abby, and said quietly, "Is that really why you think I left?"

"Not just me Gibbs. Everyone. We were all there that day. You were mad that nobody listened to you about those terrorists, but rather than dealing with it, and getting back to work, you took the easy way out and quit. Or as you like to put it, RETIRED. Why don't you just say it. You jumped ship, and abandoned all of us. Do you have any idea, ANY, about how hard Tony, Ziva, and McGee had to work to pick up the pieces of the cases you left? And Tony, how could you just throw him off the deep end that way? After all he's done for you. You didn't even give him a chance to think about it. But I'll have you know that he's done a fantastic job so far, and has managed the best he can to get through the adjustment. And I'm not even going to start on the effect that your leaving has had on Ducky."

Gibbs says nothing during Abby's entire speech. He just stands there, with his usual unreadable expression on his face.

Abby continued, "But no, of course, you have no idea about anything like that, because you're too busy being self absorbed as usual. I used to think you were different. The Gibbs I thought I knew would NEVER leave NCIS the way you did. You abandoned NCIS, Gibbs. Abandoned me……" Abby stopped short, mortified that she had almost blurted out her true feelings. She quickly turned back to her test tubes, trying not to let Gibbs see her face, which would give everything away.

"Abby, there's something that I need for you to understand.", said Gibbs, walking back towards her. Abby still had her back to him. "I'm not going to stand here and try to explain to you why I left, because to be honest, it doesn't make much sense to me anymore either." By this time, Gibbs is standing right behind Abby, who has long since stopped what she was doing. "I didn't come here to sign any papers, or to just pay you a visit. I came back today because I realized that there's been something missing in my life since I left."

Before she could stop herself, Abby said angrily, "What, you realized that you missed being the boss, and barking out impossible demands to everyone all the time?"

Gibbs placed his hands on Abby's shoulders, and slowly turned her around to face him. Her eyes remained firmly fixated on the floor; she couldn't let him see how she really felt.

"No," Gibbs replied, "The part that was missing all this time was you."

Abby could hardly believe what she had just heard. "What are you saying, Gibbs?", she said in an almost whisper, her heart pounding for the second time that day.

"I came back for you Abby. That is, if you'll forgive me."

Abby took a couple of deep breaths, trying to find the words to answer him. Finally she gave up trying and raised her eyes until they met his. As it turned out, words weren't necessary. Abby's eyes told Gibbs everything that he needed to know.

Gibbs stepped back slightly and made a few slow deliberate movements with his hands, signing something to Abby, just before wrapping his arms around Abby and pulling her close, He slowly lowered his mouth to hers, and kissed her, releasing all the pent up emotion that had been building for so long. Abby responded almost immediately, putting her arms around his neck, and drawing him deeper into the kiss. After several moments, they pulled apart slightly, but didn't release each other. Abby leaned against him, and rested her head against his chest, listening to the sound of his heart beating. For a while neither of them spoke.

"I love you too, Gibbs." Abby whispered. "Welcome home".


End file.
